everyone's got something they don't feel like visiting again.
any other requests before i bring this to the register?
[ It's a new sensation, checking in about supplies with anyone else. Will hasn't had a roommate in well over a decade, because being alone had been more important than saving money on rent, in grad school. Now, the necessity of it leaves new logistics to be navigated.
New spaces to be reminded had been empty, before. ...And more preferences to balance.
The man who never alters his opinion is like standing water, and breeds reptiles of the mind.
Sometimes, the painful things are worth revisiting most of all.
You spoil me; I could scarcely entertain a thought more favorable than chicken gumbo soup and apple pastries at this moment. ( only in that v doesn't entertain too much fantasy in his mind: only inspired plans, diligent goals. slow, steady, steadfast.
but for tonight, as he can barely move from his place on the bed — one lone bed, in a hotel with an entire separate wing destroyed, meaning...furniture is a little scarce; sharing is caring — v thinks all he might enjoy at this moment could be some meager, simple food, what clean water is still available, and...to hear and feel the nuanced ambiance of another person simply existing in the same room. that would be satisfying enough. )
my mind hasn't been standing water ever since i started breathing in sync with strangers by accident. or pressing against the plans of other kids on the bus. [ Too much, too-hot thoughts, like gripping the edge of a pot of boiling water when you forgot gloves. It's too easy to snap when he's upset, even over text, but the delay here means he can collect himself afterwards.
V was probably just being his usual contrary self, not actively suggesting Will go back to Louisiana. ] sorry. so. chicken gumbo and apple pastries.
i'll be back soon. [ Will has quite literally never typed those words in his life. Not to anyone. The realization is enough to have him blinking in over-bright indoor lighting.
Paying for groceries-for-two is similar enough to groceries-for-one in action, so it must just be Will's awareness that makes the bags feel heavier.
At least cars still work in this strange new world - Will's got his own still, and he drops the agreed-upon groceries (plus bread rolls) into the passenger seat before returning to the motel. It's not far - never is. They don't travel long distances away from each other - V because he says Will needs the protection, Will because he agrees and also a creeping concern about V's...stamina. Will's not a demon familiar, maybe, but at least he has thumbs, unlike everyone else at V's beck and call.
There's going to be another sudden ping to V's phone. ]
i left the room key with you. [ And right after: a knock at the door. ]
( this is becoming the way between them: v says so little, and Will says so much. they come away like peelings of a painting, stylistic in detail and stark in their images. v feels as though he could glance at these fragments and know they were Will, immediately.
they've only known each other shortly, it's their second week traveling together now, but quickly, even in shared quiet of motel rooms, they're all that each other knows now.
Will helps v understand nuances that he had never known as Vergil. once he had resolved to forge his own path, he had rejected much of the human world where he could — the sight of humans enjoying things and living their lives had sickened him, so of course he abstained much from anything frivolous. now, v engages with anything around him with a calm curiosity. he's been reading the Bible in the bedside table, which rests on Will's side of the bed. the television's out.
keeps him from being too distracted, when his phone chirps to life again. he glances at the screen, lit and announcing the soundless words Will has added. )
One moment.
( it seems almost ridiculous to text a reply, when the door is right there—
it takes v a few moments, rolling off of the bed, taking his cane, and moving tiredly to the door. he doesn't have to rest his weight into the assistance, rather, he has to pin the carpet to keep his balance up, and his direction to the door straight.
he pads over on bare feet and no coat, shirtless, to unlatch the metal lockings on the door. he pulls it open for Will, stood fully out of the way. )
I wondered why you left the key. ( he had noticed it on the dresser not ten minutes after Will left. )
[ It would seem ridiculous and a little bit like a way of intentionally drawing out suspense, from just about anyone else. Possibly even from V, who likes his dramatic timing and quotations and calm steady observations. It's alright - it means they're an oddly mismatched but evenly-weighted pair. It goes together not like things built to work in sync, but in the way of two separately-manufactured tools that work towards the same goal.
Dissect. Analyze. Survive.
Wax a bit too much poetry and earn a side-eye from the cashier. You know, normal human experiences. ]
I didn't know if you'd need it to get back in. Getting ice, or something from the vending machine, or... [ 'A walk' might go there, for someone else - or even V, if he hadn't expressly stayed back to rest. Will offers a shrug, not wholly uncomfortable, in its place.
He's got just one bag, courtesy of being just rude enough to interrupt a well-intentioned bagger's process of spreading six items into three bags. It swings heavily against his legs as he steps in past V, taking in and summarily dismissing the lack of shirt. They've largely been sharing beds - in the five motels they've used so far, only one has had two beds available in any halls left standing - Will's less blind to it and moreso not bothered.
Something metallic hits something else, in the bag. Ceramic, apparently - Will's put the bag on their shared dresser and takes out two wide soup mugs. Matching colors, an off-kilter green that was probably supposed to look soothing and high-end. It mostly looks slightly ill and very much manufactured for a cheap chainstore supermarket to carry for last-minute shoppers who don't want to buy dishes in an actual store.
So: these two temporarily-homeless idiots. ]
Still too hot? [ Asked without looking up from the can opener he's pulling out next. V had mentioned earlier; had dismissed a concern that he was developing a fever with an, 'I don't know that I would have the energy for that. It's only that I...tend to run warm.'
What, exactly, causes a human to control demon familiars while being simultaneously weak and deceptively, shockingly strong hasn't been explained yet. Will hasn't pressed any further than has been necessary just to feel out where the boundaries lie. Being told he runs warm had been possibly the least inexplicable part of the past eleven days. ]
( v might have accepted genuine, human forgetfulness — not to suggest that Will is ever so thoughtless, but he is occasionally weary, or...caught. in his thoughts, in himself, in the moment, from time to time. v has watched it in Will's face, like the rising of the sun or the fading of the moon in dawn.
no, Will isn't thoughtless; he instead exhibited an abundance of thought, admitted in his reply. v watches him as he takes the explanation in, mulling over it like a curious bauble handed over: worth immeasurable to a novice eye, but one must wonder, is this novice deserving of this worth?
he shuts the door behind Will, the scorching evening sun carved through with an instant darkness, replaced with the antique glow of twenty year old lamps sitting bedside and on the small, circular table holding their microwave pushed into a corner where it doesn't quite fit. they often tick the light in the bathroom on, for added illumination. )
...Thank you. ( is v responding to Will's answer just a few beats late, or is he remarking on the effort his roommate's just completed, running essential errands for the both of them? really, can't it be for both?
v moves with more than a patient speed. his sauntering is sluggish, leaning almost drunkenly into his cane. if he weren't so lucid and reactive, it might just seem so, and if he weren't moving with care, he might appear unbalanced.
he pauses, just short of Will's left shoulder, coming to look around his arm at the haul he's returned with. instead, v looks at the side of the man's face; the question he levels at him comes unexpectedly. )
Not quite. Not...now. ( he had, before, after showering especially. the cold water had been welcoming, but it was only a temporary reprieve. )
For the moment I've started feeling—
( no. he doesn't want to say more about it. the wavering at times, the quaking in his muscles — v doesn't want to think too much on it. at times, he's better, and at other times...it feels like losing control. like losing power.
it's a hot, sick flash up his chest, in his throat. a flare of panic. of all the things, v smiles, to himself before angling the look in Will's direction, letting him catch its dim, ultraviolet glow. )
...I'm sure I'm ready to eat. Doctor's orders. (Will's orders. 'you'll need to eat something, more than just trail mix and beef jerky, if you want to keep your strength.' hey, v would love to break up the monotony of salted meat and off-brand m&ms mixed with peanuts and raisins. he hasn't admitted it yet, but he isn't fond of the raisins.
he also hadn't admitted to eating most of the m&ms by himself. )
[ It's not just general politeness that means Will hadn't asked about the cane immediately. It's the fact that Will has to actively guard what he can of others', for his own sake as well as theirs. It's too easy to get stained with details he hadn't tried to access - on the rare occasion he would have to ask for information, Will weighs that option carefully.
Asking hadn't seemed necessary until the fact that they might literally need to run from demons had become abundantly clear. V had responded with characteristic vagueness, a diplomatic non-answer suited for politics - or poetry - and he's demonstrated surprising strength since then.
Just with pockets of...this. An odd exhaustion, a shakiness that Will can't help but notice. The quieter they are about it, the louder the echoes sound. Will glances over, just barely, when V sounds like he's about to share something. The silence earns him another, more noticeable glance.
Will's gaze goes from V's face - suddenly looking just a bit paler, just a little more oddly flushed at the very edges of his cheekbones, almost too shiny at his forehead even in the low light - to his hand (tremors) - down further, to bare feet. Will doesn't see people undressed often, and in this context it feels sexual not at all but intimate enormously. This is sharing a living space, an intrusion that can't be forgotten as easily as one-night stands.
Will clears his throat and starts cranking open both cans. Bachelor's instinct of preparing everything himself means he doesn't ask for help, or move aside to let V so much as attempt to prepare his own bowl or unpack the rest of the bag. ] Good.
It should be ready in... [ let the chef of the evening read the back of this can's label, first ] two minutes. Here— [ Will's popped the first mug of soup into the microwave and hit one of the automatic buttons. Now, he fishes out the bag of rolls and, freeing one from the bag, places it on a napkin and hands it to V. ]
I know you wanted bread for dessert, so hopefully this isn't overkill.
[ There's an odd shyness that wells, as he passes the food over. Will's eye contact is abruptly interrupted by him busying himself with preparing his own mug to go into the microwave next. ]
( Will has a stare that cuts like a scalpel, from time to time — precise, sharp, deep, but...painless. being peeled open doesn't always mean being ripped apart. when Will looks him over, it's passively investigative: curious, concerned, and taking stock. v can't hide, out in the open as he is, standing beside Will. he's subject to his incredibly intuitive judgment, at all times.
but there is something incredibly forgivable and appreciable in the man: that he will dissect a person, and still choose to press on, without argument. 'Good.' and that's it.
because Will knows what he can and cannot do. he knows he can warm a bowl of soup. he knows he can't do more than that, right now, thus he works with what he has, now. the similarities in tactic is striking.
therefore, admiring, if not a little relieving. v's gaze ticks down and watches what Will busies his hands with, the smallest of smiles clinging to v's lips. it's respect, isn't it? that's what shines here, in this dark pool, down at the very bottom of it.
that shyness isn't hidden either, not when passing over a modest bread roll on a napkin. v's smile deepens as he lifts his free hand up to take it, amused well by the strangeness of the interaction. v might not have thought anything of it odd if WIll weren't suddenly more jagged, his gaze almost (almost) nervous. )
The only sort of overkill I know by personal reference involves fiends and goblins. ( v lifts the round of bronze-skinned bread for emphasis. ) Not exactly the same realm as monsters. I imagine...it will be just fine.
( in fact, as v turns to step over to the foot of the bed, the end most-directly facing Will, he thinks if the bread lasts through warming both of their dinners, v will be surprised. by time he's sitting, he's already taken an unabashed bite for himself.
a thought has captured him, though, as he watches Will's back, the shifting of his shirt as he moves, filling soup mugs with soup and water from a bottle. he waits until he's swallowed down his mouthful before carefully offering: ) ...If I lured you into the tangled wood of nostalgia earlier — I apologize.
[ There's a seriousness to V that's never quite stagnant, only still. Will watches him sidelong, head turning just enough to be certain he's going to make it to rest back on the bed before Will goes back to...
To food preparation. Simple to the point of feeling it warrants an apology, or would if they hadn't been eating out of foil and crinkling bags the past week. This is warmer than trail mix and smells like...
Will opens the microwave on a dubious scent-memory just as V offers up an apology. ]
Nostalgia suggests it was worth missing. [ Braced bitterness in his tone. He stirs the soup, brings the spoon out to press the edge of a bent knuckle against it to check the temperature - still chilly. Back in the microwave. ] And...if it was worth missing, you wouldn't need to apologize.
Unless you weren't anticipating the conversation to get-- personal. [ Which is unlikely, but not impossible. V is smart, but not always the best at predicting people. He lacks the depth of intuition that Will has, or even the baseline trust that Will's seen in a few observant others. It's possible that V didn't think Will would trip up in his own memories at a mild prompting...they don't know each other that well yet, after all. V wouldn't know to anticipate how bad Will really is at compartmentalizing.
Will's been stirring the waiting mug of cold soup too long. He has to force himself to put the spoon back down, open the microwave a second time.
...Warm enough, now. ] Here.
[ It doesn't even occur to him to hold it out and expect V to come back over. Will brings the mug right back over to V, the dragging tendrils of renewed tension not lost but not as important as handing over dinner. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
any other requests before i bring this to the register?
[ It's a new sensation, checking in about supplies with anyone else. Will hasn't had a roommate in well over a decade, because being alone had been more important than saving money on rent, in grad school. Now, the necessity of it leaves new logistics to be navigated.
New spaces to be reminded had been empty, before. ...And more preferences to balance.
At least they agree on beefy mushroom soup. ]
no subject
Sometimes, the painful things are worth revisiting most of all.
You spoil me; I could scarcely entertain a thought more favorable than chicken gumbo soup and apple pastries at this moment. ( only in that v doesn't entertain too much fantasy in his mind: only inspired plans, diligent goals. slow, steady, steadfast.
but for tonight, as he can barely move from his place on the bed — one lone bed, in a hotel with an entire separate wing destroyed, meaning...furniture is a little scarce; sharing is caring — v thinks all he might enjoy at this moment could be some meager, simple food, what clean water is still available, and...to hear and feel the nuanced ambiance of another person simply existing in the same room. that would be satisfying enough. )
no subject
V was probably just being his usual contrary self, not actively suggesting Will go back to Louisiana. ] sorry. so. chicken gumbo and apple pastries.
i'll be back soon. [ Will has quite literally never typed those words in his life. Not to anyone. The realization is enough to have him blinking in over-bright indoor lighting.
Paying for groceries-for-two is similar enough to groceries-for-one in action, so it must just be Will's awareness that makes the bags feel heavier.
At least cars still work in this strange new world - Will's got his own still, and he drops the agreed-upon groceries (plus bread rolls) into the passenger seat before returning to the motel. It's not far - never is. They don't travel long distances away from each other - V because he says Will needs the protection, Will because he agrees and also a creeping concern about V's...stamina. Will's not a demon familiar, maybe, but at least he has thumbs, unlike everyone else at V's beck and call.
There's going to be another sudden ping to V's phone. ]
i left the room key with you. [ And right after: a knock at the door. ]
no subject
they've only known each other shortly, it's their second week traveling together now, but quickly, even in shared quiet of motel rooms, they're all that each other knows now.
Will helps v understand nuances that he had never known as Vergil. once he had resolved to forge his own path, he had rejected much of the human world where he could — the sight of humans enjoying things and living their lives had sickened him, so of course he abstained much from anything frivolous. now, v engages with anything around him with a calm curiosity. he's been reading the Bible in the bedside table, which rests on Will's side of the bed. the television's out.
keeps him from being too distracted, when his phone chirps to life again. he glances at the screen, lit and announcing the soundless words Will has added. )
One moment.
( it seems almost ridiculous to text a reply, when the door is right there—
it takes v a few moments, rolling off of the bed, taking his cane, and moving tiredly to the door. he doesn't have to rest his weight into the assistance, rather, he has to pin the carpet to keep his balance up, and his direction to the door straight.
he pads over on bare feet and no coat, shirtless, to unlatch the metal lockings on the door. he pulls it open for Will, stood fully out of the way. )
I wondered why you left the key. ( he had noticed it on the dresser not ten minutes after Will left. )
no subject
Dissect. Analyze. Survive.
Wax a bit too much poetry and earn a side-eye from the cashier. You know, normal human experiences. ]
I didn't know if you'd need it to get back in. Getting ice, or something from the vending machine, or... [ 'A walk' might go there, for someone else - or even V, if he hadn't expressly stayed back to rest. Will offers a shrug, not wholly uncomfortable, in its place.
He's got just one bag, courtesy of being just rude enough to interrupt a well-intentioned bagger's process of spreading six items into three bags. It swings heavily against his legs as he steps in past V, taking in and summarily dismissing the lack of shirt. They've largely been sharing beds - in the five motels they've used so far, only one has had two beds available in any halls left standing - Will's less blind to it and moreso not bothered.
Something metallic hits something else, in the bag. Ceramic, apparently - Will's put the bag on their shared dresser and takes out two wide soup mugs. Matching colors, an off-kilter green that was probably supposed to look soothing and high-end. It mostly looks slightly ill and very much manufactured for a cheap chainstore supermarket to carry for last-minute shoppers who don't want to buy dishes in an actual store.
So: these two temporarily-homeless idiots. ]
Still too hot? [ Asked without looking up from the can opener he's pulling out next. V had mentioned earlier; had dismissed a concern that he was developing a fever with an, 'I don't know that I would have the energy for that. It's only that I...tend to run warm.'
What, exactly, causes a human to control demon familiars while being simultaneously weak and deceptively, shockingly strong hasn't been explained yet. Will hasn't pressed any further than has been necessary just to feel out where the boundaries lie. Being told he runs warm had been possibly the least inexplicable part of the past eleven days. ]
no subject
no, Will isn't thoughtless; he instead exhibited an abundance of thought, admitted in his reply. v watches him as he takes the explanation in, mulling over it like a curious bauble handed over: worth immeasurable to a novice eye, but one must wonder, is this novice deserving of this worth?
he shuts the door behind Will, the scorching evening sun carved through with an instant darkness, replaced with the antique glow of twenty year old lamps sitting bedside and on the small, circular table holding their microwave pushed into a corner where it doesn't quite fit. they often tick the light in the bathroom on, for added illumination. )
...Thank you. ( is v responding to Will's answer just a few beats late, or is he remarking on the effort his roommate's just completed, running essential errands for the both of them? really, can't it be for both?
v moves with more than a patient speed. his sauntering is sluggish, leaning almost drunkenly into his cane. if he weren't so lucid and reactive, it might just seem so, and if he weren't moving with care, he might appear unbalanced.
he pauses, just short of Will's left shoulder, coming to look around his arm at the haul he's returned with. instead, v looks at the side of the man's face; the question he levels at him comes unexpectedly. )
Not quite. Not...now. ( he had, before, after showering especially. the cold water had been welcoming, but it was only a temporary reprieve. )
For the moment I've started feeling—
( no. he doesn't want to say more about it. the wavering at times, the quaking in his muscles — v doesn't want to think too much on it. at times, he's better, and at other times...it feels like losing control. like losing power.
it's a hot, sick flash up his chest, in his throat. a flare of panic. of all the things, v smiles, to himself before angling the look in Will's direction, letting him catch its dim, ultraviolet glow. )
...I'm sure I'm ready to eat. Doctor's orders. ( Will's orders. 'you'll need to eat something, more than just trail mix and beef jerky, if you want to keep your strength.' hey, v would love to break up the monotony of salted meat and off-brand m&ms mixed with peanuts and raisins. he hasn't admitted it yet, but he isn't fond of the raisins.
he also hadn't admitted to eating most of the m&ms by himself. )
no subject
Asking hadn't seemed necessary until the fact that they might literally need to run from demons had become abundantly clear. V had responded with characteristic vagueness, a diplomatic non-answer suited for politics - or poetry - and he's demonstrated surprising strength since then.
Just with pockets of...this. An odd exhaustion, a shakiness that Will can't help but notice. The quieter they are about it, the louder the echoes sound. Will glances over, just barely, when V sounds like he's about to share something. The silence earns him another, more noticeable glance.
Will's gaze goes from V's face - suddenly looking just a bit paler, just a little more oddly flushed at the very edges of his cheekbones, almost too shiny at his forehead even in the low light - to his hand (tremors) - down further, to bare feet. Will doesn't see people undressed often, and in this context it feels sexual not at all but intimate enormously. This is sharing a living space, an intrusion that can't be forgotten as easily as one-night stands.
Will clears his throat and starts cranking open both cans. Bachelor's instinct of preparing everything himself means he doesn't ask for help, or move aside to let V so much as attempt to prepare his own bowl or unpack the rest of the bag. ] Good.
It should be ready in... [ let the chef of the evening read the back of this can's label, first ] two minutes. Here— [ Will's popped the first mug of soup into the microwave and hit one of the automatic buttons. Now, he fishes out the bag of rolls and, freeing one from the bag, places it on a napkin and hands it to V. ]
I know you wanted bread for dessert, so hopefully this isn't overkill.
[ There's an odd shyness that wells, as he passes the food over. Will's eye contact is abruptly interrupted by him busying himself with preparing his own mug to go into the microwave next. ]
no subject
but there is something incredibly forgivable and appreciable in the man: that he will dissect a person, and still choose to press on, without argument. 'Good.' and that's it.
because Will knows what he can and cannot do. he knows he can warm a bowl of soup. he knows he can't do more than that, right now, thus he works with what he has, now. the similarities in tactic is striking.
therefore, admiring, if not a little relieving. v's gaze ticks down and watches what Will busies his hands with, the smallest of smiles clinging to v's lips. it's respect, isn't it? that's what shines here, in this dark pool, down at the very bottom of it.
that shyness isn't hidden either, not when passing over a modest bread roll on a napkin. v's smile deepens as he lifts his free hand up to take it, amused well by the strangeness of the interaction. v might not have thought anything of it odd if WIll weren't suddenly more jagged, his gaze almost (almost) nervous. )
The only sort of overkill I know by personal reference involves fiends and goblins. ( v lifts the round of bronze-skinned bread for emphasis. ) Not exactly the same realm as monsters. I imagine...it will be just fine.
( in fact, as v turns to step over to the foot of the bed, the end most-directly facing Will, he thinks if the bread lasts through warming both of their dinners, v will be surprised. by time he's sitting, he's already taken an unabashed bite for himself.
a thought has captured him, though, as he watches Will's back, the shifting of his shirt as he moves, filling soup mugs with soup and water from a bottle. he waits until he's swallowed down his mouthful before carefully offering: ) ...If I lured you into the tangled wood of nostalgia earlier — I apologize.
no subject
To food preparation. Simple to the point of feeling it warrants an apology, or would if they hadn't been eating out of foil and crinkling bags the past week. This is warmer than trail mix and smells like...
Will opens the microwave on a dubious scent-memory just as V offers up an apology. ]
Nostalgia suggests it was worth missing. [ Braced bitterness in his tone. He stirs the soup, brings the spoon out to press the edge of a bent knuckle against it to check the temperature - still chilly. Back in the microwave. ] And...if it was worth missing, you wouldn't need to apologize.
Unless you weren't anticipating the conversation to get-- personal. [ Which is unlikely, but not impossible. V is smart, but not always the best at predicting people. He lacks the depth of intuition that Will has, or even the baseline trust that Will's seen in a few observant others. It's possible that V didn't think Will would trip up in his own memories at a mild prompting...they don't know each other that well yet, after all. V wouldn't know to anticipate how bad Will really is at compartmentalizing.
Will's been stirring the waiting mug of cold soup too long. He has to force himself to put the spoon back down, open the microwave a second time.
...Warm enough, now. ] Here.
[ It doesn't even occur to him to hold it out and expect V to come back over. Will brings the mug right back over to V, the dragging tendrils of renewed tension not lost but not as important as handing over dinner. ]